well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
