I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*