Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
