Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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