Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
