if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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