I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
