I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize