THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
