i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
