Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
