how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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