try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
