Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry mjsmclaren hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.

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(240): View more from Maryland

At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka

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(319): View more from Iowa

then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.

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(208): View more from Idaho

You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.

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(214): View more from Texas

I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship

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(209): View more from California

Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.

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(519): View more from Ontario

You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.

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(766): View more from

My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.

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