Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(602): View more from Arizona

Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum

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(519): View more from Ontario

Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.

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(516): View more from New York

he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board

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(703): View more from Virginia

I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.

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(631): View more from New York

Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?

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(775): View more from Nevada

Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum

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(317): View more from Indiana

I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town

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