I accidentally had phone sex last night
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
