Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
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