I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
