and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
please don't ironically join a cult
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