Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I pooped in a mop bucket.
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.