Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(970): View more from Colorado

i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.

Fav 10 1031 6518
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(917): View more from New York City

I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.

Fav 15 6138 1362
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(785): View more from Kansas

my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working

Fav 11 3742 1140
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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(817): View more from Texas

I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.

Fav 4 2184 1533
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(908): View more from New Jersey

Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate

Fav 3 2631 1191
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

no more duck duck goose at the bar

Fav 6 2617 1140
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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN

Fav 1 802 654
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(734): View more from Michigan

Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?

Fav 2 519 329
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