I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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