He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
