so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize