And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
