i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
In the future we'll all be gay
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
