i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
