Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize