in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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