god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Randomize
