talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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