Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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