do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
