I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
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