I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I wish I could punch you in the face.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
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