fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize