Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Randomize
