i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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