I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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