Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
