this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
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