guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
