no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
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Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
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Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic