So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone