I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I touched a dick in church today
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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