if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
