Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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