Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
