Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
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I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
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So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
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