shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
