Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Randomize
