P.S. I can't hear my feet
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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