Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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